Unxibelelwano lwenkcubeko kunye noBuchule
Ngokwenkcubeko Unxibelelwano kunye noBuchule kwi-ICERM Radio yasasazwa ngoMgqibelo, Agasti 6, 2016 @ 2 PM Eastern Time (eNew York).
2016 Summer Lecture Series
Umxholo: “UNxibelelwano ngokweNkcubeko kunye nobuGcisa”
Abahlohli abandwendwelayo:
U-Beth Fisher-Yoshida, Ph.D., (CCS), Mongameli kunye neCEO ye Fisher Yoshida International, LLC; UMlawuli kunye neFaculty ye-Master of Science kwiNgxoxo kunye neSisombululo seNgqungquthela kunye noMlawuli oLawulayo we-Advanced Consortium yeNtsebenziswano, iNgqungquthela kunye nokuBamba nzima (AC4) kwiZiko loMhlaba, zombini kwiYunivesithi yase-Columbia; kunye noMlawuli weNkqubo yoXolo noKhuseleko yoLutsha kwi-AC4.
URia Yoshida, MA, UMlawuli wezoNxibelelwano kwa Fisher Yoshida International.
Ushicilelo lweNtetho
Ichweba lomlambo: Mholo! Igama lam ndinguRia Yoshida.
eBhete: Kwaye ndinguBeth Fisher-Yoshida kwaye namhlanje singathanda ukuthetha nawe malunga nentsimi yeengxabano phakathi kwenkcubeko kwaye siza kusebenzisa amava esiye saba nawo ngokobuqu emsebenzini wethu kunye nokuphila kwihlabathi jikelele, okanye kwindawo yokusebenza kunye nomsebenzi wethu kunye nabathengi. Kwaye oku kunokuba kumanqanaba ambalwa ahlukeneyo, umntu unokuba kwinqanaba lomntu kunye nabathengi apho sisebenza nabo kwimeko yokuqeqesha. Enye inokuba kwinqanaba lombutho apho sisebenza namaqela ahluke kakhulu okanye aneenkcubeko ezahlukeneyo. Kwaye indawo yesithathu inokuba kuxa besisebenza kwiindawo apho unamaqela ahlukeneyo abantu abanikezela ngeentsingiselo ezahlukeneyo ukuba lilungu loluntu.
Ngoko njengoko sisazi, ihlabathi liya lisiba lincinci, kukho unxibelelwano ngakumbi nangakumbi, kukho ukuhambahamba. Abantu bayakwazi ukujongana nomahluko okanye abanye rhoqo, rhoqo kakhulu kunangaphambili. Kwaye ezinye zazo ziyamangalisa kwaye zityebile kwaye zinika umdla kwaye izisa iyantlukwano eninzi, amathuba okuyila, ukusonjululwa kweengxaki ngokudibeneyo, iimbono ezininzi, njalo njalo. Kwaye kwicala lalo nto, ikwalithuba lokuvela kwempixano eninzi kuba mhlawumbi imbono yomntu ayifani neyakho kwaye awuvumelani nayo kwaye uyaphikisana nayo. Okanye mhlawumbi indlela yokuphila yomntu ayifani neyakho, kwaye kwakhona uyayithatha ingxaki kwaye mhlawumbi uneesethi ezahlukeneyo zamaxabiso njalo njalo.
Ke singathanda ukuphonononga ngemizekelo embalwa enenyani yento eyenzekileyo kwaye emva koko sibuye umva kwaye sisebenzise ezinye zezixhobo kunye nezicwangciso esiqhele ukuzisebenzisa emsebenzini wethu nakubomi bethu ukujonga ezinye zezo meko. ngokucokisekileyo. Ke mhlawumbi sinokuqala ngoRia sinika umzekelo wokuba nikhule nobabini e-US naseJapan, kwaye mhlawumbi kukho into eyenzekileyo kuni engumzekelo wongquzulwano lwenkcubeko.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ngokuqinisekileyo. Ndikhumbula xa ndandineminyaka eyi-11 kwaye ndaqala ukufudukela e-US ukusuka eJapan. BekuseCawe school, besijikeleza iclassroom sizazisa kwafika ixesha lam ndathi molo igama lam ndinguRia andikho krelekrele. Yayiyimpendulo ye-autopilot eneminyaka eyi-11 kwintshayelelo kwaye ngoku, xa ndicinga ngayo, ndiyaqonda ukuba amaxabiso eJapan kufuneka abe nokuthobeka kunye nomoya wokuthobeka eyona nto bendizama ukuyilandela. Kodwa endaweni yoko, impendulo endayifumanayo kwabo ndandifunda nabo yayiyeyenceba – “Awu, ayicingi ukuba ikrelekrele.” Kwaye kukho umzuzu apho ndaziva ndinqunyanyisiwe ngexesha kwaye ndafakwa ngaphakathi "Owu, andisekho kwindawo enye. Akukho zinkqubo zexabiso ezifanayo okanye iimpembelelo zayo”, kwaye kwafuneka ukuba ndiphinde ndihlole imeko yam kwaye ndiqaphele ukuba kukho umahluko ngokwenkcubeko.
eBhete: Umzekelo omhle kakhulu apho, unomdla. Ndiyazibuza ke, xa ubunamava aloo nto, awufumananga mpendulo ubuyilindele, awufumananga mpendulo ubunokuyifumana eJapan, kwaye eJapan ibinokuba yeyokudumisa “Oh. , khangela indlela athobeke ngayo, onjani wona umntwana omangalisayo; endaweni yoko waba nosizi. Kwaye ke, ucinga ntoni ngaloo nto malunga nendlela oziva ngayo kunye neempendulo ezivela kwabanye abafundi.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ke kukho umzuzwana apho ndaziva ndihlukene nam kunye nabanye. Kwaye ndandikufuna ngamandla ukunxibelelana nabanye endandifunda nabo. Ukuba ngaphaya kwemilinganiselo yenkcubeko yaseJapan okanye yaseMelika, kwakukho le mfuneko yomntu yokufuna ukudibanisa nabanye abantu. Ukanti kwakukho le ncoko yangaphakathi eyayisenzeka kum, enye yengxabano apho ndandivakalelwa kukuba “aba bantu abandiqondi” kwanothi “Yintoni ephosakeleyo endiyenzileyo?”
eBhete: Inika umdla. Ke uthethe izinto ezimbalwa endifuna ukuzikhulula kancinci njengoko sisiya phambili. Ngoko enye kukuba uziva ukwahlukana nawe kunye nokuhlukana nabanye abantu kwaye njengabantu, njengoko abanye abantu betshilo, izilwanyana zentlalo, intlalontle, ukuba sinesidingo. Enye yeemfuno ezichongiweyo ezichongiweyo ngabantu abohlukeneyo luluhlu lweemfuno, jikelele ngokubanzi kunye nezikhethekileyo, ekufuneka sinxibelelane, sibe ngabathile, sibe kunye nabanye, kwaye oko kuthetha ukuqondwa, ukuvunywa, ukuxatyiswa. , ukuthetha into elungileyo. Kwaye yimpendulo esebenzisanayo apho sithetha okanye senze into ethile, sifuna ukufumana impendulo ethile kwabanye esenza sizive silungile ngathi, malunga nobudlelwane bethu, malunga nehlabathi esikulo, kwaye ke loo nto ibangela impendulo elandelayo evela. thina; kodwa ubungayifumani loo nto. Ngamanye amaxesha abantu, nabani na kuthi, kwiimeko ezinjalo banokukhawuleza ukugweba nokubeka ityala kwaye elo tyala linokuza ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Omnye usenokuba ugxeka omnye – “Yintoni engalunganga ngabo? Ngaba abazi ukuba bafanele baphendule ngendlela ethile? Ngaba abayazi ukuba bafanele ukundiqaphela baze bathi 'oh wow, indlela athobeke ngayo.' Ngaba abayazi ukuba yiloo nto emele yenzeke?” Uphinde wathi “Mhlawumbi kukho into engalunganga ngam”, ngoko ke ngamanye amaxesha sijika eso tyala ngaphakathi kwaye sithi “Asanelanga. Asichanekanga. Asazi ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni.” Ithoba ukuzithemba kwethu kwaye ke kukho iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zokusabela kuloo nto. Kwaye kunjalo, kwiimeko ezininzi sinetyala lokuhamba ngeendlela zombini, sigxeka omnye kwaye sizibeke ityala, singadali imeko emnandi kakhulu kuloo meko.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe. Kukho inqanaba lempixano eyenzeka kumanqanaba ngamanqanaba - ngaphakathi nangaphandle - kwaye awahlukani. Impixano inendlela yokungena kwimeko kunye namava ngeendlela ezininzi ezahlukeneyo.
eBhete: Yinyani. Kwaye ke xa sithetha igama elithi impixano, ngamanye amaxesha abantu bayasabela kuloo nto ngenxa yenqanaba lethu lokungonwabi ekulawuleni impixano. Kwaye ndiza kuthi "Bangaphi abantu abathanda ingxabano?" kwaye ngokusisiseko akukho mntu unokusiphakamisa isandla sakhe ukuba ndikhe ndawubuza loo mbuzo. Kwaye ndicinga ukuba kukho izizathu ezimbalwa zokuba; enye kukuba asiyazi indlela yokulawula impixano njengesixhobo semihla ngemihla. Sinengxabano, wonke umntu uneengxabano, kwaye ke asazi ukuba sizilawula njani, oko kuthetha ukuba azihambi kakuhle, oko kuthetha ukuba sitshabalalisa okanye sonakalisa ubudlelwane bethu kwaye ngoko ngokwemvelo sifuna ukuba neendlela ezimbalwa, ukuphepha. bebacinezela, behleli nje kude kubo ngokupheleleyo. Okanye sinokucinga ngokuyeka imeko yongquzulwano, sithi, “Uyazi, kukho into eyenzekayo apha. Akuvakali mnandi kwaye ndiza kujonga indlela yokuziva ngcono ngale meko kwaye ndithathe ukuvela kolu ngquzulwano njengethuba lokudala impixano elungileyo okanye ungquzulwano olwakhayo. ” Ke kulapho ndicinga ukuba sinethuba lokwahlula impixano eyakhayo, oku kuthetha inkqubo eyakhayo yokujongana nempixano ekhokelela kwisiphumo esakhayo. Okanye inkqubo eyonakalisayo yendlela esilawula ngayo imeko yengxabano ekhokelela kwisiphumo esiyingozi. Kwaye ke mhlawumbi singaphonononga ukuba kancinci emva kokuba siye mhlawumbi isibini imizekelo ngakumbi yeemeko.
Ngoko unike umzekelo wemeko yobuqu. Ndiza kunika umzekelo wemeko yombutho. Ke kumsebenzi omninzi owenziwa ndim noRia, sisebenza namaqela eenkcubeko ezahlukeneyo ngaphakathi kwimibutho yezizwe ngezizwe, yeenkcubeko ngeenkcubeko. Ngamanye amaxesha iba mandundu ngakumbi xa kukho amanye amanqanaba okuntsonkotha okongeziweyo afana nobuso ngobuso ngokuchasene namaqela abonakalayo. Njengoko sisazi, kwinkalo yonxibelelwano kukho okuninzi okwenzekayo ngaphandle komlomo, inkangeleko yobuso, izijekulo njalo njalo, eziye zilahleke xa unyanisekile, kwaye ke ngenene ufumana i-twist entsha kuyo xa ingaphakathi kuphela. ukubhala kwaye awunayo nemilinganiselo eyongeziweyo yethoni yelizwi apho. Ewe, khange ndithethe zonke iingxaki zolwimi ezenzekayo, nokuba uthetha 'ulwimi' olunye, ungasebenzisa amagama ahlukeneyo ukuzichaza kwaye inenye indlela yokuhla.
Ngoko ufuna ukucinga ngombutho, sicinga ngeqela leenkcubeko ezahlukeneyo kwaye ngoku unalo, masithi, amalungu ama-6 kwiqela. Unamalungu ama-6 avela kwiinkcubeko ezahlukeneyo kakhulu, uqhelaniso lwenkcubeko, okuthetha ukuba bazisa kunye nayo yonke enye iseti ukuba kuthetha ukuthini ukuba sembuthweni, kuthetha ukuthini ukusebenza, kuthetha ukuthini ukuba sembuthweni. iqela, kwaye ndilindele ntoni kwabanye kumaqela ngokunjalo. Ke ngoko, rhoqo kumava ethu, amaqela akahlali phantsi ekuqaleni kokudibana athi “Uyayazi into, masijonge ukuba siza kusebenzisana njani. Siza kululawula njani unxibelelwano lwethu? Siza kulawula njani xa kukho ukungavisisani? Siza kwenza ntoni? Kwaye siza kuzenza njani izigqibo?" Ngenxa yokuba oku akuchazwanga ngokucacileyo kwaye ngenxa yokuba ezi zikhokelo azihlaziywa, kukho amathuba amaninzi eemeko zongquzulwano.
Sinemilinganiso embalwa eyahlukeneyo esiyisebenzisileyo kwaye kukho isalathiso esimangalisayo, iSAGE Encyclopedia of Intercultural Competence, kwaye mna noRia sibe nethamsanqa ngokwaneleyo lokumenywa ukuba senze ungeniso oluliqela kuloo nto. Kwelinye lamanqaku ethu sijonge imilinganiselo eyahlukeneyo eyahlukeneyo esiyiqokelele kwimithombo eyahlukeneyo kwaye seza malunga ne-12 kubo. Andizukuhamba phezu kwazo zonke, kodwa kukho isibini esinokuba sifanelekileyo ekuhloleni ezinye zezi meko. Umzekelo, ukuphepha ukungaqiniseki - kukho ezinye iziqhelaniso zenkcubeko ezikhululekileyo kunye nokungacaci kunezinye. KuLawulo oluDityanisiweyo lweNgcaciso ebizwa ngokuba yi-CMM, kukho uluvo lomnye wemigaqo yemfihlakalo, kwaye sonke sinamanqanaba ahlukeneyo ngokwahlukeneyo ngokwenkcubeko nangokwenkcubeko malunga nokuba kungakanani na ukungacaci okanye imfihlakalo engakanani esikhululekileyo ukujongana nayo. Kwaye emva koko, sihamba ngaphaya komphetho kwaye "Akusekho. Andisakwazi ukujongana nale nto.” Ke kwabanye abantu abanokuphepha okuphantsi kakhulu kokungaqiniseki, banokufuna ukuba nesicwangciso esenziwe ngocoselelo kunye ne-ajenda kunye neshedyuli kwaye yonke into ichazwe ngaphambili phambi kwentlanganiso. Ngolunye uthintelo oluphezulu lokungaqiniseki, “Uyazi, masihambe nje ngokuqukuqelayo. Siyazi ukuba kufuneka sijongane nezihloko ezithile, siza kubona nje ukuba kuvela ntoni kuloo meko.” Ewe, ungacinga ukuba uhleli egumbini kwaye kukho umntu ofuna i-ajenda engqongqo kakhulu kwaye omnye umntu ochasayo i-ajenda engqongqo kwaye ufuna ukuba ngaphezulu kokuhamba kwaye avele ngakumbi. Kwenzeka ntoni apho ukuba abanalo olo hlobo lwencoko malunga nendlela esiza kuyicwangcisa ngayo i-ajenda, indlela esiya kuzenza ngayo izigqibo, njalo njalo.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe! Ndicinga ukuba la ngamanqaku amnandi ngokwenene esinamacala amaninzi umntu ngamnye kwaye ngokudibeneyo, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha iba yindida ukuba ngokuchaseneyo kunokubakho kwaye kungqinelane. Kwaye le nto iyenzayo kukuba, njengoko ukhankanyile, inethuba lokuyila ngakumbi, iyantlukwano ngakumbi, kwaye idala amathuba amaninzi okuba kubekho impixano. Kwaye ukujonga oko njengethuba lokutshintsha, njengethuba lokwandiswa. Enye yezinto endingathanda ukuyiqaqambisa kuxa silawula amanqanaba okunganyamezeli ngaphakathi kwethu, kunye namanqanaba okuxhalaba, kwaye amaxesha amaninzi siyakhawuleza ukusabela, siphendule ngokukhawuleza kuba ixhala esinalo alinakunyamezeleka. Kwaye ngakumbi ukuba asinalo ulwimi oluninzi malunga nezi zihloko, zingenzeka kwimizuzwana phakathi kwabantu. Kwaye kukho inqanaba lencoko engaphezulu kwaye kukho incoko yemeta. Kukho unxibelelwano rhoqo okwenzekayo phakathi kwabantu non-ngomlomo kwihlabathi meta, asiyi kufumana kakhulu kwiifilosofi yalo kuba sifuna ukulungisa ngaphezulu isixhobo kunye nendlela yokulawula ezi meko.
eBhete: Kunene. Ke ndicinga ukuba sifuna ukwenza nzima izinto kancinci kancinci, kuthekani ukuba songeza kuyo yonke idimension yomgama wamandla? Ngubani onelungelo lokugqiba ngento esiyenzayo? Ingaba sinayo i-ajenda? Okanye ngaba sihamba kunye nokuvela kunye nokuhamba kwezinto ezenzekayo ngelo xesha? Kwaye kuxhomekeke ekubeni loluphi uqhelaniso lwenkcubeko onalo malunga nomgama wamandla, unokucinga ukuba “Kulungile, ukuba ngumgama wamandla aphezulu ayinamsebenzi into endiyicingayo okanye endiyikhathaleleyo kuba kufuneka ndiyohluke kwigunya eliphezulu kwigumbi. ” Ukuba usuka kumgama ophantsi wamandla okuqhelaniswa nawo, ke kufana nokuthi “Sonke sikule nto kwaye sonke sinethuba lokuthatha izigqibo kunye.” Kwaye kwakhona, xa unalo ngquzulwano, xa unomntu onegunya eliphezulu okanye igunya elicinga ukuba uza kwenza ezo zigqibo kodwa acele umngeni, okanye babone ukuba lucelomngeni, ngomnye umntu xa besenza izigqibo. Asizange silindele ukufumana omnye umntu ukuba aveze uluvo lwakhe ngezinto, emva koko sinezinye iimeko.
Kwakhona ndandifuna ukuzisa umxholo wesithathu apho ezi ngxabano zenkcubeko zinokuthi zenzeke khona, kwaye oko kuluntu. Kwaye enye yezinto ezenzekayo emhlabeni, kwaye ayithethi ukuba yenzeka kuzo zonke iindawo zehlabathi, kodwa ngokubanzi, kwaye ndiyazi ngokwam amava okukhulela kwindawo enye iminyaka emininzi de ndaya. ikholeji xa uthelekisa ngoku xa unenqanaba elongeziweyo lokushukuma ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukeneyo. Kungaba ngenxa yokuba sineemeko zababaleki, sinokuhamba ngaphakathi kwenkcubeko, njalo njalo. Kukho iziganeko ezininzi zeentlobo ezahlukeneyo zabantu abavela kwiimvelaphi ezahlukeneyo, amaqela eentlanga ezahlukeneyo, ukuqhelaniswa okungafaniyo, abahlala ngaphakathi kuluntu olufanayo. Kwaye ke inokuba yinto echuliweyo njengamavumba okupheka ahlukeneyo anokuthi aqonde abamelwane ngokwenene ukuba bangene kwiimeko zongquzulwano kuba bengathandi, kwaye abaqhelanga kwaye bagwebe, amavumba okupheka avela kwindlu yommelwane. Okanye sinokuba nommandla apho kukho indawo ekwabelwana ngayo esidlangalaleni njengepaki okanye iziko loluntu okanye nje izitrato ngokwazo, kwaye abantu baneendlela ezahlukeneyo zokujonga ukuba kuthetha ukuthini ukwabelana ngeso sithuba, kwaye ngubani onamalungelo kuloo ndawo. , kwaye siyinyamekela njani loo ndawo, yaye imbopheleleko kabani? Ndiyakhumbula ngoku, ndikhulele kwisiXeko saseNew York kwaye wawuyihoye eyakho indlu kwaye ubunomntu ohoya isakhiwo kunye nezitrato njalo njalo, ngokusisiseko izitrato zazingeyondawo yamntu ngokwenene. Kwaye ke xa ndihlala eJapan, yayinomdla kum indlela abantu ababeza kuhlangana ngayo - ndicinga ukuba kanye ngenyanga okanye kabini ngenyanga - ivolontiya ukuya kucoca ipaki yendawo. Kwaye ndikhumbula ndibethwa kakhulu yile nto kuba ndacinga “Wow. Okokuqala, benza njani abantu ukuba benze loo nto?” kwaye wonke umntu uyenzile loo nto ndiye ndazibuza ukuba "Ngaba kufuneka ndenze loo nto nam, ngaba ndiyinxalenye yolu luntu okanye ndingasebenzisa isizathu sokungabikho kule nkcubeko?" Kwaye ndicinga ukuba ngamanye amaxesha ndaye ndacoca, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndasebenzisa ukungafani kwenkcubeko yam ukuba ndingakwenzi oko. Ke zininzi iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokujonga umxholo, kukho izakhelo ezahlukeneyo zendlela esinokuqonda ngayo. Ukuba sinengqondo yokuba luxanduva lwethu ukuthatha umva kwaye siqonde.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ngoko ke ngokusekwe kulwazi lwakho lwemiba eyahlukeneyo yenkcubeko efana neenqobo kunye neminye imilinganiselo, ucinga ukuba kutheni le nto yenzeka ngolo hlobo? Abantu baseJapan badibana njani njengeqela kwaye kwenzeka njani ukuba ukwahluka kwenkcubeko eMelika okanye amava akho kwisiXeko saseNew York abonakalise indlela eyenze ngayo?
eBhete: Ke izizathu ezimbalwa kwaye ndicinga ukuba akwenzeki nje ukuba ngequbuliso le yinto eqhelekileyo. Yinxalenye yenkqubo yethu yemfundo, yinxalenye yoko ukufundayo esikolweni malunga nokuba kuthetha ukuthini ukuba lilungu elinegalelo elihle kuluntu. Kukwayile nto uyifundiswayo kusapho lwakho, ukuba zeziphi iinqobo ezisemgangathweni. Koko ukufundiswayo kwindawo ohlala kuyo, yaye akupheleli nje ekufundiseni ngabom kodwa koko nakubonayo. Ke ukuba ubona umntu evula i-candy wrapper kwaye eyiphosa phantsi, okanye ubona ukuba i-candy wrapper iphelela kwibhasikithi yenkunkuma, okanye ukuba akukho bhasikithi yenkunkuma ngeenxa zonke, ubona umntu ebeka eso sisongelo epokothweni yakhe. ukulahlwa kwingobozi yenkunkuma kamva, emva koko uyafunda. Ufunda malunga nokuba yeyiphi imimiselo yoluntu, malunga nokuba yintoni na kwaye akufanelekanga. Ufunda ikhowudi yokuziphatha, iikhowudi zakho zokuziphatha zaloo meko. Ke kwenzeka usemncinci kakhulu, yinxalenye yelaphu lakho, ndiyacinga, ukuba ungubani. Kwaye ke eJapan ngokomzekelo, ngakumbi i-collectivist, uluntu lwasempuma, kukho inkolelo eninzi yokuba indawo ekwabelwana ngayo yindawo yoluntu, njalo njalo, ngoko ke ndicinga ukuba abantu beza ngaphambili. Ngoku, anditsho ukuba lilizwe elilindelekileyo kuba kukwakho neendawo ekwabelwana ngazo ekungekho mntu ubangwayo kwaye ndibone inkunkuma eninzi njengaxa sasihamba sinyuka intaba kwaye ndikhumbula ndifumana inkunkuma kum. ukuphikisana okukhulu kwinto eyenzekayo kuba ndacinga ukuba kutheni kule ndawo, akukho mntu ucocayo, ukuba le ndawo ikhona kwaye bahlambulule inkunkuma; kanti kwezinye iindawo abantu bacinga ukuba wonke umntu udlala indima ethile. Ke yinto endiyibonayo kwaye ngenxa yoko, xa ndibuyela e-US, xa ndibuyela e-US ukuya kuhlala kwaye xa ndibuyela e-US ukutyelela, ndiye ndazi ngakumbi ezo ntlobo zokuziphatha, ndiye ndazi ngakumbi. yendawo ekwabelwana ngayo endingazange ndibe nayo ngaphambili.
Ichweba lomlambo: Inika umdla ngokwenene. Ke kukho isiseko esikhulu senkqubo kwizinto ezininzi esizifumana mihla le. Ngoku, kubaphulaphuli bethu abaninzi oku kunokuba yinto eyoyikisayo. Zeziphi ezinye izixhobo esinokuzilungisa ngoku ukuze sincede abaphulaphuli bethu baqonde kwimeko yongquzulwano abanokujongana nayo, kwindawo abasebenza kuyo, kubomi babo bobuqu, okanye kwindawo abahlala kuyo?
eBhete: Zimbini ke izinto. Enkosi ngokubuza loo mbuzo. Ngoko enye ingcamango ukucinga malunga nento endiyikhankanyileyo ngaphambili, i-CMM - ULawulo oluLungeleleyo lweNgcaciso, enye yemigaqo esisiseko apha kukuba sidala ihlabathi lethu, sakha ihlabathi lethu lentlalontle. Ke ukuba senze into ukudala imeko engathandekiyo oko kuthetha ukuba sinakho ukuguqula loo meko kwaye siyenze ibe yimeko entle. Ngoko ke kukho ingqiqo arhente esinayo, ngokuqinisekileyo kukho iimeko njengabanye abantu kunye nomxholo esikuwo kuluntu njalo njalo, ukuba nefuthe kangakanani arhente okanye ulawulo ngokwenene phezu ukwenza umahluko; kodwa sinayo loo nto.
Ke ndikhankanye omnye wemigaqo emithathu yemfihlakalo ngaphambili, ejikeleze ukungaqondakali kunye nokungaqiniseki esinokujika sikuthi, uyazi ukuba yintoni, ikwayinto yokusondela ngokufuna ukwazi, sinokuthi "Wow, kutheni yenzeka ngale ndlela?" okanye “Hmm, umdla ndiyazibuza ukuba kutheni besilindele ukuba le nto yenzeke kodwa endaweni yoko yenzeka.” Leyo yindlela epheleleyo yokufuna ukwazi kunokuba ukugweba kunye neemvakalelo ngokungaqiniseki.
Umgaqo wesibini kukuyondelelana. Ngamnye wethu njengabantu uzama ukuqonda, sizama ukwenza intsingiselo yeemeko zethu, sifuna ukwazi ukuba ikhuselekile, ayikhuselekanga na, sifuna ukuqonda ukuba oku kuthetha ukuthini kum? Kundichaphazela njani oku? Ibuchaphazela njani ubomi bam? Iluchaphazela njani ukhetho ekufuneka ndilwenzile? Asithandi i-dissonance, asithandi xa singenalo ukuhambelana, ngoko sihlala sizama ukwenza ingqiqo yezinto kunye neemeko zethu, sihlala sizabalazela ukwenza ingqiqo yokusebenzisana kwethu nabanye; nto leyo ekhokelela kumgaqo wesithathu wolungelelwaniso. Abantu, njengoko besichazile ngaphambili, bangabantu basekuhlaleni kwaye kufuneka banxulumane omnye nomnye; ubudlelwane bubalulekile. Kwaye oko kuthetha ukuba kufuneka sidanise kwingoma enye, asifuni ukunyathela iinzwane zomnye nomnye, sifuna ukulungelelana, kungqamaniso nabanye ukuze senze intsingiselo ekwabelwana ngayo kunye. Kwaye xa ndinxibelelana nomntu owahlukileyo kum, ndifuna ukuba bayiqonde into endiyithethileyo ngendlela endifuna ukuqondwa ngayo. Xa singenalo ulungelelwaniso, mhlawumbi kukho imfihlelo eninzi kubudlelwane, ngoko asinako ukuhambelana. Ngoko ke yomithathu le migaqo iyasebenzisana enye kwenye.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe, kulungile. Into endiyicholayo kakhulu ngale nto kukuba sinokuba nako ukuzazi ngokwaneleyo ukuze sizive sihambelana ngaphakathi kwethu. Kwaye sinokufumana ukungavisisani phakathi kwethu ngabanye phakathi kwendlela esiziva ngayo, into esiyicingayo, kunye nento esinethemba lokuba iya kuba yiyo. Ke xa sinxibelelana kubudlelwane nabanye abantu, nokuba ngomnye umntu okanye kwiqela okanye kumbutho weqela, abantu abaninzi, kokukhona iba nzima ngakumbi. Ke singayilawula njani incoko yethu yangaphakathi ngendlela enentsingiselo yokuzisa intsebenziswano ngaphakathi kwethu ngethemba lokuba injongo yethu ihambelane nefuthe esinalo kunxibelelwano lwethu.
eBhete: Ke ukuba sicinga ngathi, ibinzana eliye lasetyenziswa ngabanye, 'izixhobo zokutshintsha' oko kuthetha ukuba yonke imeko esingena kuyo silithuba lokutshintsha kwaye siseso sixhobo sokuthetha, ukuba umntu unento ngqo. impembelelo kuyo yonke into esingqongileyo. Oko kuthetha ukuba sinokuphenjelelwa ngcono okanye okubi kwaye kuxhomekeke kuthi ukwenza isigqibo, kwaye lukhetho kuba sinalo maxesha anzima xa sinokwenza ukhetho. Asisoloko sisazi ukuba sinokhetho, sicinga ukuba “bendingenalo olunye ukhetho, bekufuneka ndenze le ndiyenzileyo”, kodwa eneneni kokukhona kunyuka ukuzazi kwethu, kokukhona siziqonda ngakumbi, kokukhona sisaziqonda. siqonde iinqobo ezisemgangathweni zethu kunye neyona nto ibalulekileyo kuthi. Kwaye ke silungelelanisa unxibelelwano lwethu kunye nokuziphatha kunye nolo lwazi kunye nokwazisa, ngoko ngakumbi i-arhente kunye nolawulo esinalo malunga nendlela esichaphazela ngayo ezinye iimeko.
Ichweba lomlambo: Kakhulu. Khumbula uBeth, ubuthetha malunga neCMM indlela yokudala indawo kunye ne-tempo kunye nexesha kunye nokuba kubaluleke kangakanani oku.
eBhete: Ewe, ke ndihlala ndisithi ixesha liyinto yonke kuba kukho into yokulungela okanye ukulunga ekufuneka yenzeke kuwe, umxholo, nelinye iqela ngokunjalo, malunga nokuba uza kuzibandakanya njani kwaye nini. Xa sikwimo eshushu kakhulu ngokweemvakalelo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba asingobantu bangcono, ngoko ke lixesha elifanelekileyo lokuthatha inyathelo emva kwaye singazibandakanyi nomnye kuba akukho nto yakhayo eza kuphuma kuyo. Ngoku, abanye abantu bayathenga ekungeneni umoya, kwaye kufuneka kungene umoya, kwaye andiyichasi loo nto, ndicinga ukuba kukho iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokujongana nokuchazwa kweemvakalelo kunye nenqanaba leemvakalelo esinazo kunye nokwakhayo. kuloo meko ithile naloo mntu uthile malunga naloo ngxaki. Kwaye ke kukho i-tempo. Ngoku, ndisuka kwisiXeko saseNew York kwaye kwisiXeko saseNew York sinesantya esikhawulezayo kakhulu, kwaye ukuba kukho unqumamo lwemizuzwana emi-3 kwincoko oko kuthetha ukuba lithuba lam kwaye ndingatsibela kanye apho. Xa sinesantya esikhawulezayo, kwaye kwakhona ukukhawuleza kukugweba - kuthetha ukuthini ukukhawuleza? xa sine tempo evakala ngokukhawuleza kumntu okule meko, asiziniki thina okanye elinye iqela ixesha okanye indawo ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo, ukucinga ngokucacileyo malunga nokuba kuqhubeka ntoni kwaye babeke phambili iminqweno yabo. ukukhokelela kwiinkqubo ezakhayo kunye neziphumo ezakhayo. Ke into endiyithethayo kukuba kwiimeko zongquzulwano, kulungile ukuba sinokuba nalo lwazi lokucothisa isantya, sithathe inyathelo emva kwaye sidale eso sithuba. Ngoku ngamanye amaxesha, ngokwam, ndibona indawo ebonakalayo, indawo ebonakalayo kwindawo yam esifubeni apho iimvakalelo zam zikhona, intliziyo yam, kwaye ndibona indawo ebonakalayo phakathi kwam nomnye umntu. Kwaye ngokwenza oko, oko kuyandinceda ukuba ndithathe umva, ndivule iingalo zam phezulu, kwaye ndidale eso sithuba endaweni yokuba ndibambene kakhulu ngokwasemzimbeni, ndibambe iingalo nesifuba kuba oko kundigcina ndiqinile ngokwasemzimbeni. Ndifuna ukuvuleka nto leyo ethetha ukuba kufuneka ndithembe kwaye ndibe sesichengeni kwaye ndizivumele ukuba ndibe sesichengeni kwaye ndithembe into eyenzekayo komnye.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe, iyamangalisa ngokwenene. Ndiyayiva indawo ephakathi kunye nento ethi kum kukuba eyona nto iphambili kubudlelwane, ukuba ayindim ngokuchasene nomnye, mna ngokuchasene nehlabathi, ukuba ndihlala ndibudlelwane nabantu. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndifuna ukuba 'ngalunganga' kuba ndifuna kubekho ithuba lokuba omnye umntu athethe inyani yakhe, ukuze size kwisiphumo soyilo okanye injongo okanye indalo kunye. Kwaye kunjalo, akukho malunga nokulungileyo okanye okungalunganga kodwa ngamanye amaxesha yiloo nto ingqondo ethethayo. Kukho imvakalelo yencoko eqhubekayo kwaye ayikokuphakama ngaphezulu kwencoko okanye ukuyihoya, kodwa kukuqonda oko kwaye yinxalenye yoguquko kumhla wethu wobuntu ukuya kwiintsuku.
eBhete: Ke ndicinga ukuba kwezinye iimeko, zishushu kakhulu kwaye ziyingozi. Kwaye ziyingozi kuba abantu baziva besongelwa, abantu baziva bengakhuselekanga. Siyazi ukuba xa sivula iindaba ngalo naluphi na usuku siva iimeko ezininzi ezinje ngokuba apho kukho ngokwenene, into endiya kuyithetha, kukungaqondi, ukunqongophala kokunyamezela, kunye neso sithuba sokuqonda abanye kwaye akukho. hayi loo mnqweno. Ke xa ndicinga ngokhuseleko kunye nokhuseleko ndicinga ngalo kumanqanaba ahlukeneyo ahlukeneyo, enye kukuba sinomnqweno kunye nesidingo sokhuseleko lomzimba. Kufuneka ndiyazi ukuba xa ndivula ucango lwam lokushiya ikhaya lam ndiya kukhuseleka ngokwasemzimbeni. Kukho ukhuseleko lweemvakalelo, kufuneka ndiyazi ukuba ukuba ndizivumela ukuba ndibe sesichengeni somnye, ukuba baya kuba novelwano kwaye bandinyamekele kwaye bangafuni ukundenzakalisa. Kwaye kufuneka ndiyazi ukuba ngokwasengqondweni, ngokwasengqondweni ndikwanokhuseleko kunye nokhuseleko, ukuba ndithatha umngcipheko kuba ndiziva ndikhuselekile ukwenza njalo. Kwaye ngelishwa ngamanye amaxesha sifika kwinqanaba elinjalo lobushushu, ngenxa yokunqongophala kwexesha elingcono, ukuba ukhuseleko lukude kakhulu kwaye asiboni nokuba kunokwenzeka njani ukufikelela kweso sithuba sokhuseleko. Ke ndicinga ukuba kwezinye zezo ntlobo zeemeko, kwaye oku kukuziqhelanisa nenkcubeko kakhulu, kuxhomekeke kwinkcubeko akukhuselekanga ukuba ubuso ngobuso nomnye umntu kwaye uzame ukusombulula loo mpixano phakathi kwenkcubeko. Kufuneka sibe nendawo ebonakalayo kwaye kufuneka sibe nomntu okanye iqela labantu abakhoyo njengabaququzeleli beqela lesithathu lolo hlobo lwengxoxo. Kwaye ingxoxo yeyona nto siyidinga ngokwenene ukuba sibe nayo apho kungeyomfuneko ukuba siza kwisigqibo malunga nokuba senze ntoni na, kuba asikakulungeli ukuyenza loo nto. Kufuneka siyivule ngenene eso sithuba sokuqonda kwaye sibe nenkqubo yoququzelelo yeqela lesithathu ivumela ukwabelana ngolwazi ukwenza nzulu ukuqonda, kunye nokwabelana ngolwazi ngomququzeleli weqela lesithathu ukuze kube mnandi kwaye kuqondakala kwabanye. Ngaphezu koko, ngokwesiqhelo, ukuba sishushu kwaye siyaziveza, akudlali ngendlela eyakhayo kuphela malunga noko ndikudingayo kodwa ikwagxeka enye. Kwaye elinye icala alizukufuna ukuva nakuphi na ukugwetywa kwabo kuba baziva bengathabathi cala nakwelinye icala.
Ria: Ewe. Eyona nto ihlokomayo yile ngcamango kunye nokuziqhelanisa nokubamba indawo, kwaye ndiyalithanda kakhulu elo binzana - indlela yokubamba indawo; indlela yokubamba indawo yethu, indlela yokubamba indawo yomnye kunye nokubamba indawo yobudlelwane kunye nokuba kwenzekani. Kwaye ndifuna ngokwenene ukuqaqambisa le ngqiqo ye-arhente kunye nesiqwenga sokuzazi ngenxa yokuba iyaziqhelanisa kwaye ayikokuba igqibelele kwaye imalunga nokuqhelisela okwenzekayo. Xa ndikhumbula emva kweso sihlandlo xa ndandineminyaka eli-11 ubudala kwisikolo seCawa ebudeni bentshayelelo yam, ngoku njengomntu omdala, ndiyakwazi ukucinga emva ndize ndibone ukuntsonkotha kwemizuzwana embalwa ndize ndikwazi ukuyityhila loo nto ngendlela enentsingiselo. Ke ngoku ndiyakha esi sihlunu sokuzihlaziya kunye nokuzihlola, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha siyakusuka kwiimeko sibhideke kakhulu yile nto isandula ukwenzeka. Kwaye sikwazi ukuzibuza ukuba "Kwenzeke ntoni? Kwenzeka ntoni?” Siziqhelanisa nokujonga kwiilensi ezahlukeneyo, kwaye mhlawumbi xa sinokubeka etafileni ukuba iilensi zethu zenkcubeko zithini, zithini iimbono zethu, yintoni eyamkelekileyo eluntwini kwaye yintoni endiye ndasilela kuyo, sinokuqala ukuyifaka ngaphakathi. kwaye uyitshintshe ngendlela enentsingiselo. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha xa sinotshintsho olukhawulezileyo, kunokubakho ukubuyisela umva. Ke ukubamba isithuba sokutyhala emva, ukubamba isithuba songquzulwano. Kwaye ngokusisiseko le nto sithetha ngayo apha kukufunda ukuba ungahlala njani kwindawo apho ungakhululekanga. Kwaye loo nto ithatha ukuziqhelanisa kuba ayikhululekanga, ayizukuziva ikhuselekile ngokuyimfuneko, kodwa yindlela esizibamba ngayo xa sisiva ukungonwabi.
eBhete: Ke ndicinga ngoku e-US apho kukho imiba emininzi eyenzekayo kunye nokwahlukana ngokobuhlanga, njengoko abanye abantu beyibiza. Kwaye ukuba sijonga kwihlabathi jikelele kukho imiba yobunqolobi kunye nokuba kwenzekani, kwaye kukho iincoko ezinzima ngokwenene ekufuneka zenzeke kwaye ngoku kukho ukusabela okukhulu kunye nokusabela kuyo kwaye abantu bafuna ukugxeka ngokukhawuleza. Kwaye benza ukutyhola ndicinga ngaphandle kwengqiqo yokuzama ukufumanisa ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni kwaye ndifumanise indlela yokhuseleko. Ukutyhola kakade njengoko besesitshilo ngaphambili, asiyonkqubo eyakhayo kuba endaweni yokugxeka mhlawumbi kufuneka sibuye umva sizame ukuqonda. Kwaye ke kufuneka kubekho ukuphulaphula okuninzi okwenzekayo, kufuneka kubekho indawo yokhuseleko kunye nokuthembana kangangoko ukuba neengxoxo ezinzima. Ngoku asizukuziva mnandi kwinkqubo yokuba nayo kuba siza kuziva sidiniwe ngokwasemzimbeni, ngokwasengqondweni, ngokweemvakalelo kukwenza oko kwaye mhlawumbi singakhuselekanga. Ke kwezo meko, ndingatsho ukuba kulungile ukuba izinto ezi-2 zenzeke. Ke ku-1 kukuba ube nezakhono, uqeqeshe iingcali ezingabaququzeleli ukuba bakwazi ngokwenene ukubamba eso sithuba kwaye banike ukhuseleko oluninzi kangangoko banakho esikhaleni. Kodwa kwakhona, abantu abathatha inxaxheba kufuneka bathathe uxanduva lokufuna ukuba lapho kunye nokubamba eso sithuba sokwabelana. Okwesibini kukuba, kwihlabathi elilungileyo, esinokulidala – alikho kude kuthi, bekungayi kuba kuhle ukuba sonke besinohlobo oluthile lokufunda nophuhliso olusisiseko malunga nezi ntlobo zezakhono. Kuthetha ukuthini ukuzazi ngokwenene? Kuthetha ukuthini ukuqonda iinqobo ezisemgangathweni zethu kwaye yintoni ebalulekileyo kuthi? Kuthetha ukuthini ukuba nesisa ngokwenene ekuqondeni abanye kwaye ungatsibi ukugxeka, kodwa uthabathe inyathelo emva kwaye ubambe indawo kwaye ubambe ingcamango yokuba mhlawumbi banento entle ngokwenene abanokuyinikela? Mhlawumbi kukho into entle ngokwenene nexabisekileyo ukuba ungubani loo mntu kwaye uya kumazi loo mntu. Kwaye eneneni, mhlawumbi ndakuba ndimazi laa mntu, mhlawumbi ndiye ndadibana naloo mntu kwaye mhlawumbi sinokuninzi okufanayo kunokuba bendicinga ukuba senze. Kuba nangona ndibonakala ndahlukile kuwe, ndisengakholelwa kwimigaqo esisiseko efanayo kunye nendlela endifuna ukuphila ngayo ubomi bam, nendlela endifuna ngayo usapho lwam luphile ubomi balo kwindawo ekhuselekileyo, enothando. .
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe. Ngoko ke malunga nokudala isikhongozeli kunye nokudala ubudlelwane kunye, kwaye kukho ukukhanya kunye nesithunzi esingamacala aphikisanayo kwingqekembe enye. Ukuba sakha njengoko sinjalo, sikhazimle njengoko sinokuba njengabantu, sinokutshabalalisa kwaye sibe yingozi kuthi nakuluntu lwethu. Ke ngoku silapha, kweli hlabathi, ndiyazi ukuba kukho imithi ekhula ide ilingane neengcambu zayo, kwaye ke thina njengabantu sidibana njani kwaye sikwazi ukunikela ingqalelo ngokwaneleyo kwaye sizinikele ngokwaneleyo ukuba sibambe? ezi ziphazamiso kwaye ngokuyimfuneko ukuzilawula. Kwaye ukumamela sisiqalo esihle kakhulu, kukwanzima kakhulu kwaye kufanelekile; kukho into exabiseke gqitha ekuphulaphuleni nje. Kwaye into ebesiyithethile ngaphambili endiyicingayo kukuba ndikholelwa ngenene ekubeni nebhunga, kwaye ndiyakholelwa nakwiingcali zonyango, ukuba kukho iingcali phaya ezihlawulwayo ukuba zimamele kwaye zive nyani. Kwaye bahamba kulo lonke olu qeqesho ukuze babambe indawo ekhuselekileyo kwisikhongozeli somntu ngamnye ukuze xa sikwingxaki yeemvakalelo, xa sijongene nesiphithiphithi kwaye kufuneka sishukumise amandla ethu ukuze sithwale uxanduva lokuzikhathalela. , ukuya kwibhunga lethu, ukuya kwindawo yethu ekhuselekileyo, kubahlobo bethu abasenyongweni kunye neentsapho kunye nabo sisebenza nabo, kwiingcali ezihlawulwayo - nokuba ngumqeqeshi wobomi okanye ingcali yezonyango okanye indlela yokuzithuthuzela.
eBhete: Utsho ke ibhunga kwaye ndicinga ukuba sijonge kwiinkcubeko ezahlukeneyo kwihlabathi kunye nezithethe ezahlukeneyo kwihlabathi liphela. Kukho olo hlobo lokubonelela kwihlabathi jikelele, babizwa nje ngezinto ezahlukeneyo kwiindawo ezahlukeneyo. E-US sikholisa ukuba proclivity ngokubhekiselele kunyango kunye neengcali zonyango, kwezinye iindawo abakwenzi kuba luphawu okanye uphawu ubuthathaka ngokweemvakalelo ukuze babengafuni ukwenza oko, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo asiyiyo le nto sikhuthazayo. Into esikhuthazayo nangona kunjalo kukufumanisa ukuba ungalifumana phi elo bhunga kunye neso sikhokelo esiya kukunceda ube kwindawo ekhuselekileyo. Xa ndicinga ngokumamela ndicinga ngamanqanaba amaninzi ahlukeneyo kwaye simamele ntoni, kwaye enye yeendawo zophuhliso esizifundileyo kwinkalo yokusombulula ungquzulwano luluvo lokumamela iimfuno kwaye ke sinokuthi maninzi. ngezinto ezahlukeneyo kwaye ndithatha inyathelo emva koqeqesho lwam kwaye ndithi "Kwenzeke ntoni apha? Bathini kanye kanye? Bafuna ntoni kanye kanye?” Ekupheleni kosuku, ukuba kukho into enye endinokuyenza ukuze ndiphuhlise ubudlelwane obuhle nalo mntu kwaye ndibonise ukuqonda okunzulu, kufuneka ndiqonde into abayidingayo, kufuneka ndiyiqonde loo nto kwaye ndikhangele iindlela zokuhlangabezana nale mfuno kuba abanye bethu bathetha kakhulu ngento esiyithethayo, kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo asithethi kwinqanaba leemfuno kuba oko kuthetha ukuba sisengozini, siyavula. Abanye, kwaye ngokukodwa kwiimeko zongquzulwano, sonke sinokuba kwimeko apho singakwaziyo ukuthetha kwaye sihlambalaza kwaye sigxeka kwaye ngokwenene sithetha nje izinto ezingayi kusibeka apho sifuna ukuya khona. Ke, amaxesha amaninzi ndiyakwazi ukuba ndim okanye ndibone abanye abantu bekwiimeko kwaye ezintloko zethu sithi “Hayi, musa ukuya apho”, kodwa eneneni siya kanye apho, ngenxa yemikhwa yethu singena kanye kuloo mgibe. nangona sisazi kwinqanaba elinye ukuba ayizukusibeka apho sifuna ukuba khona.
Enye into ebesithetha ngayo ngaphambili, yonke ingcamango malunga nokwakha kunye nokutshabalalisa kwaye unike isifaniso esihle semithi eneengcambu ezinzulu njengoko inde intle kwaye iyamangalisa ngaxeshanye, kuba ukuba sinako kuhle kakhulu kwaye kuyakha, oko kuthetha ukuba sinakho ukutshabalalisa kwaye senze izinto endicinga ukuba siya kuzisola ngokunzulu. Ke ngoku nyani ukufunda indlela yokulawula ukuze singayi apho, sinokuya phezulu kodwa hayi nzulu apho kuba singafika kwindawo yokungabuyi kwaye siyakwenza izinto esiya kuthi sizisole ngazo ubomi bethu bonke kwaye. buza ukuba kutheni senze loo nto kwaye kwakutheni ukuze sikuthethe oko, ngoxa eneneni yayingeyiyo injongo yethu ukwenza loo nto okanye sasingafuni ngokwenene ukwenza uhlobo lomonakalo. Sisenokuba siye sacinga ukuba senze oko okwangoku ngenxa yokuba besinovakalelo olungathethekiyo, kodwa eneneni ukuba sihla siye kutsho kubunzulu bokuba singobani ayisiyiyo le nto besifuna ukuyidala emhlabeni.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe. Kumalunga nenqanaba lokuvuthwa mhlawumbi lokukwazi ukuza kwindawo apho xa sineempembelelo ezinamandla zokusabela ngokweemvakalelo, imalunga nokukwazi ukuyila eso sithuba ukuze sikwazi ukuyihambisa ngokwethu, sibe noxanduva kuyo. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ngumba wenkqubo, inokuba ngumba wenkcubeko apho xa siqikelela okwenzekayo kuthi, kwaye oku kuhlala kusenzeka xa sigxeka, isizathu sokuba sibeke ityala kwabanye abantu kungenxa yokuba akukhululeki ukuyibamba ngaphakathi kwethu, ukuthi “Mhlawumbi ndiyinxalenye yale ngxaki.” Kwaye ke kulula ukutyhala ingxaki komnye umntu ukuze siziva silungile kuba sikwimo yonxunguphalo, kwaye sikwimo yokungakhululeki. Kwaye inxalenye yale nto kukufunda ukuba ukungonwabi kunye nokungonwabi kunye nokuba nongquzulwano yinto eqhelekileyo kwaye mhlawumbi singade sidlulele ngaphaya kwesi sithuba sokuphendula siye kulindelekile. Ayikuko ukuba oku kuyenzeka, kuxa oku kusenzeka ndingayilawula njani ngcono, ndingaba ngoyena ndoqo wam; nokuza kuzilungiselele.
eBhete: Bendicinga nangombhidazo owukhankanye ngaphambili njengokutyhola abanye kodwa kwangaxeshanye ndifuna abanye basibambe basibambe ngendlela ekhuselekileyo. Ngoko ngamanye amaxesha sityhala into esiyifunayo ngokwenene kwezo meko, kubandakanywa nathi, ukuba sizikhanyele okanye sizihlekise xa ngokwenene sifuna ukuba nathi sikwazi ukubonisa kwaye sibonise kakuhle kuloo meko.
Ichweba lomlambo: Ewe. Kuninzi esithethe ngako apha kwaye ndicinga ukuba kuya kuba kuhle ukuba sivule umgca kungekudala kwaye sive imibuzo enokuthi abaphulaphuli bethu banayo.
eBhete: Ingcinga entle. Ke ndifuna ukubulela wonke umntu ngokumamela namhlanje kwaye sinethemba lokuva kuwe, kwaye ukuba akunjalo ekupheleni kwale mnxeba kanomathotholo, mhlawumbi ngelinye ixesha. Enkosi kakhulu.
